My understanding of coaching
How I understand human beings
I see people as independently thinking, social, spiritual and meaning oriented human beings, who, by the ability of the language, can reflect her own actions and their effects and therefor are able to choose. The more we get conscious – self-understanding, stance, attitude, believes, actions, impact – the more we can choose our actions.
I meet people and the way they go in their life with great respect. I see my task in showing others their behaviour and its effect on others in a way, which allows a new choice to them, even in new, unex-pected situations. Then, they can fully take on the responsibility for themselves and their impact. Es-tablishing the new choice in the personal world then needs much practice and often also support.
Among other things, prerequisites for a successful coaching are for me respect, confidence, transpar-ency, honesty and integrity. That means we respect and trust each other. We disclose structures, atti-tudes and feelings without judging and hold on to what we promise. We create a frame for new in-sights and points of view which we then check for whether they are useful for us and the whole.
I follow the “EMCC code of ethics”.
Coaching and its impact
Coaching is a form of learning. As a contrary to educational learning, where it goes around intellectual knowledge, is coaching learning in action, which means experiential learning.
Prerequisite is the willingness to let go known understandings and to bring new things into life.
It is all about to gain a new freedom in treating oneself and others in different circumstances. One could say enhancing sovereignty and deepen serenity. Often it goes around our impact of others in the areas of leadership and convincing. Face to face or in teams.
Off course we would normally like to solve a specific problem, i.e. communication with specific people. My question does not only point on the solution of this problem, more on how we get more freedom in similar future situations and circumstances. It is not about to get rid of something, it is about enhanc-ing the view angel, that means to add something.
Approach
During my more then 25 years experience as a coach and assessor, I was able to meet many interesting people. I am still fascinated by their uniqueness of the curriculum vitae. To be able to handle these situations I learned to handle and use a row of methodologies and systems which allow different views and accesses to these questions. Therefore I am educated and experienced as NLP-Master, Systemic Constellations, Wing-Wave, tapping, mindfulness and many facets of them. The overall un-derstanding is given by the ontological approach. I am deepening this approach continuously and of course I try out all that on myself.
Ontological Coaching
The ontological approach understands people as observers of phenomenon. Instantly we give the observed a meaning which colours our „reality“ and determines what seems possible to us.
This meaning is given by the triplet „language – body – mood“. This gives our “way of being” and our self-understanding. If we can understand the triplet and its impact on our actions and are able to change it, automatically the meaning will change – or who we are – and the possible actions.
Through specific distinctions in language, body and moods we understand our behaviour differently and enhanced. The consequences are more inner silence, serenity and more effectiveness.
Actions
We will have mainly conversations, in other words investigations through dialog. They show on one side which „inner conversations“ are already there and dominant. On the other side are we going to develop different conversations which allow to seeing the world differently and what this can allow as an impact. In this way a choice develops after the criteria “what deserves mostly?” and what stance is required.
The transfer happens in practice in cases where we normally won’t bring in new approaches. That means at the border of comfort learning. If necessary we can train some behaviour.
Action
We will have mainly conversations, in other words investigations through dialog. They show on one side which „inner conversations“ are already there and dominant. On the other side are we going to develop different conversations which allow to seeing the world differently and what this can allow as an impact. In this way a choice develops after the criteria “what deserves mostly?” and what stance is required.
The transfer happens in practice in cases where we normally won’t bring in new approaches. That means at the border of comfort learning. If necessary we can train some behaviour.
• We start with the investigation of actual conversations and views which determine the reality. What self-understanding leads to this?
• We separate the facts from the interpretations and story about them.
• Then we investigate other interpretations and their possible impact.
• At the end the Coachee chooses his favourite interpretation and asks what is needed to bring that into reality.
This can be a quite emotional process which leads to much more energy at the end.
